Inertia
by Zhong TianHui
Summary: Like any object acted upon by two balanced forces, Karura is unable to move— stuck somewhere between life and death, between the two people she loves the most. Stuck… until someone lets go. (AU setting; Warning- character death)
1. Home

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. *Other notes and disclaimers will be placed at the bottom of the page- to prevent spoilers and the such.*

Notes: This story is set in an AU where Sasori doesn't leave Suna. Let's imagine that the Third Kazekage either retired or was killed after the war so the Fourth takes on the hat as Kazekage.

Enjoy.

x.X.x

"May I…please…go home now?" The words came out in between several shaky breaths, as she placed her hand above her husband's. He was about to protest when Chiyo's monotonous voice cut the silence, "There's nothing we can do for her anymore, Kazekage-sama." The elder doesn't bother to put it out gently.

"She's as good as dead, right now. There is too much copper in her system— we have no way of taking it out."

Karura held his hand just a little tighter before he could wheel around and turn his frustrations on Chiyo— just a little because she no longer has energy for anything else. With a small nod, she repeated her earlier request. "Let's go…home…" Unlike her husband, she's already seen, already accepted the inevitable.

_How long can someone live with only half their heart anyway?_ Karura briefly glanced at the calendar at the far end of the hospital room, though she didn't need it to remind her that it's been three years, eight months and around a week since… someone left the world and took half her heart with him. The other half is in someone's iron grip— clinging desperately and tying her to the dark earth that he lives in.

Like any object acted upon by two balanced forces, Karura is unable to move— stuck somewhere between life and death, between the two people she loves the most. Stuck… until someone lets go.

x.X.x

Notes: For those who are curious, the disease is called Wilson's disease.


	2. Ghosts, phantoms, and dark angels

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

x.X.x

The Yondaime Kazekage was unwilling to let go— not to even loosen his hold on her. "I cannot lose you," he would say. Either that or "Don't die on me." Karura would smile at him, lift her hand to cup his cheek, usually failing to do so but he picks it up and presses her hand against his face anyway. It was quite like him— short sentences, a command instead of a request. She would try to obey…try because that's all she could do when he refuses to budge.

Neither did Sasori stop calling from beyond the grave, explaining to her exactly what was happening with that familiar air of expertise— someone who could wax eloquent on strange and morbid topics yet make them seem as beautiful as the desert sunset. _"Your liver lacks the mechanisms to regulate the copper in your body— most likely a genetic problem. The excess would build up in the liver and the rest of your organs."_

Karura watched him as he sat down on the bed beside her. She didn't have to be dying to know that she was hallucinating; he didn't have to be dead for her to know that her mind was playing tricks on her. Sasori would never analyze her like that— not in the quiet moments when the light lends itself to soft repose… or would he? The memory thins in her mind and maybe it's her brain ceasing to function or was she starting to forget… Forget exactly when he spoke with a cool scientific detachment and how he spoke when he was referring to her.

Karura closed her eyes for a moment, wondering what exactly resurrected her dark angel today. Was it old memories? His birthday was coming up soon. Was it death? Had he come to take her now? Or was it those certain secrets that nagged at the back of her head— secrets never to be shared even in the brink of death? Ghosts and phantoms and demons come to remind her that she has been deceitful to someone she held dear. Ghosts and phantoms and dark angels come to remind her that because of it she could never give her all to anyone— always torn apart by two equally strong forces, love and guilt join hand in hand.

Her mind was spinning— she almost didn't notice when Sasori placed his hands on her cheeks and tilted her head up. _"I can see the golden-brown copper ring at the edge of your iris. A physical manifestation of the disease… It looks strangely beautiful against indigo."_ Karura closed her eyes and parted her lips to ask him what he was doing here. But when her eyes reopened, someone else was holding her.

"There is a copper ring visible in her eyes," the Kazekage said, bringing his hands away from her cheeks. "Do you think—"

"I'm sorry, Kazekage-sama. If I pull it out of her, it would do more harm than good. It would just kill her."

The second voice was familiar— was that one of her husband's old friends? Another person who trained under the Third because of the magnet release they possessed? She hadn't known the boy was still alive. Last she remembered, most of those with the kekkei genkai died in the war.

She saw the man leave the room without another word. She saw her husband hold her hand— a hand in the ugliest shade of highlighter yellow she's ever seen, and she thinks that she must look like some odd cartoon character right now. But perhaps not, because the look on her husband's face was serious…all too serious.

"I… I don't want you to die," he said, his voice was hoarse and Karura could tell that he's been hiding the tears and the grief for her death— because essentially, she was _already_ dead. All of her children have already made peace with that fact— it took a while, the whole week of her sickness actually, but they finally accepted it. There was nothing to deny when an organ shuts down everyday and on the best days she can't even pull herself out of bed.

But her husband… She reached out to brush his hair away from his face, parting her lips to ask a question. There seemed to be a change in the air. Something was different with how he acted— it looked like tears were about to spill out of his eyes. Never once had she seen the man cry, not really. Even now that his shoulders were hunched sitting on a chair beside her, she knew that the tears probably weren't going to fall. But what changed?

The Kazekage finally moved, a sigh escaped from his lips. He turned to face her but was momentarily distracted— eyes landing on a small trinket by her bedside. Her eyes followed his gaze to the small globe, the magnets positioned above and below it made it spin continuously on its axis.

When she turned back to face him, her husband pressed a kiss on her lips, firm and with all the demanding of a person who would never be able to do it again. It seemed like forever— forever where she could only put the smallest bit of pressure before she started to feel faint— before he finally pulled away, eyes averted. He pulled back and said nothing as he headed for the door.

She wanted to call out to him— to find the strength, to find the voice, to find the will to say what has been eating her heart little by little each passing day. _I'm sorry, my dear. I'm sorry…for deceiving you…all these years. For only giving you a piece of myself when you gave me your all. For not being able to let go because I love him too. For not telling you because I love you too. And I'm selfish and… I can't understand why you care so much, why you're always with me when I'm just a liability— no help in your shinobi work, no help in making you a Kazekage, no help in anything. I can't even live long enough to be of use to you… I thought you only took in things of value? What value is there in a woman who is only moments away from breathing her last?_

Instead, a small sob came out, choking back all her words. He didn't hear…and maybe it's better that way. Better that he leave her and all the dark memories of her sickness with her— he didn't need to be reminded of how weak she was right now, how hard it was for her to just sit up straight. Though, Karura could have sworn that when he stopped by the door and turned to look at her once more, he said "The world keeps on turning." And a ghost of an "I love you" mouthed out but not said.

"I love you…" It was all she managed to say, to choke out of her parched lips, a faint smile coloring them. _Yes, the world keeps on turning…and I love you so… and you'll be alright even after I'm gone— maybe even better…I am of no use anymore…and the sun will shine just as brightly in your days as it did in ours. You'll be alright…you will heal because you're strong like that… and you've finally let go…and you'll let go of me…perhaps…thank you… _

Now, all that was left was Sasori's voice, echoing in the distance. Pleading. Enticing. Beckoning.


	3. The world keeps on turning

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

x.X.x

Karura thought it would be quick— though it probably was and really only a day has passed but it seemed like an eternity. Time seemed to slow down as she stared at the revolving globe beside her bed, the pillow obscuring her vision slightly.

The world keeps on turning.

_"Do you like it?"_ A voice called from somewhere in the room…or from sometime before- a ghost from the past. She could remember watching the globe spin without it being connected to anything— amazement echoed in her eyes. "It's beautiful, but you didn't need to get me anything," Karura whispered, repeating a conversation that played out several years ago. _"You're the Kazekage's wife. It's only proper that I present you something today."_ She smiled to herself in the dark of the room, "I didn't get you anything for your birthday, Sasori."

The world keeps on turning.

That probably wasn't the reason why he gave her the little gift, but it was the only thing that echoed in her mind whenever she looked at the globe— Chiyo's hand on her shoulder, eyes dry though Karura was sure most of the village heard her howl out when the news first came about. With a practiced mask, eyes that have seen one too many deaths, Chiyo reminded her that the world kept on turning— it stopped for no one. Not even Sasori.

The world keeps on turning.

No matter how much she begged for it to stop.

The world kept on spinning endlessly on its axis, spinning in a dizzying haze of life. Spinning too fast so that people topple over things inside this world, rarely steady, rarely secure, rarely sure of their footing. Spinning too fast that it often makes people bump into each other.

Sometimes the spin makes them fall right into someone's arms and there is nothing else to do but hold on tight— tight because the world is spinning so fast they might just fly out of each others' arms. Hold tight and laugh and cry and love and live! All in that intoxicating rhythm. Until the spin got to her head and she let go for a while…and she let go for a while only to have him slip away from her reach and come back in a mess of red and red and more red. Her setting sun was bleeding before her and she could not even come close enough to say goodbye— couldn't even move her feet.

Her setting sun was bleeding before her…leaving her to an eternal night. And though the gold stars twinkling in the distance are beautiful…beauty that could only be seen when the sun was gone…her world suddenly felt

Dark. Dim. Empty.

The world keeps on turning, and memories continue on with their nature— small wisps and fragments slipping away like water through fingers. Not even the grandest explosion could be heard in space… like noticing a ripple in the ocean. The world keeps on turning and how Karura wanted to just throw the stupid globe away— _stop reminding me that the world is turning, that people are going on with their lives when mine has come to a complete halt!_ But she can't throw the globe away— not when memories were fading so quickly.

It was the only thing he's given her— not counting the letters they've read and burned and thrown away. Evidence to be disposed of. Not even a picture. Not even a picture of them together.

She wondered if her husband would feel just as distraught as she did upon the death of a loved one. She wondered if it was even a proper thought— to compare how she felt with Sasori's death and how her husband would feel about hers. Perhaps, he'd fare better— he is stronger and he's seen more death than she has.

Perhaps, he wouldn't question why the sun still felt hot on skin— unlike her who still felt cold without a familiar warmth. Perhaps, he wouldn't think about how stupid it was that the sun still rises and sets— how it looked strangely bluer and not the vibrant crimson it used to be. Her whole world painted blue…

**_Only blue._**

**_Lonely blue._**

**_Within me blue._**

**_Without you._**

Blue and not her beloved red. The world continued to turn, unmindful of her…well, not grief, nor mourning...That is too light a word. Life goes on, unmindful of her _suffering_. Unmindful of the fact that for three years, eight months and around a week, she has been dying little by little everyday.

No. Karura knew that her husband and her family would fare better than her. They knew how to handle death. There was some closure. They spent time together. She told them repeatedly how much she loves them. It was not sudden nor violent. No. They had a whole week caring for a dying woman.

Perhaps, they would even be glad if she finally welcomed death. Yes. Death might be better than hanging on by a thread, willing dying organs to work, battling against the toxins that built up in her system— against the copper that destroyed her very cells. Cheaper too— and helpful to other shinobi if she didn't need blood transfusions everyday. Yes, perhaps dying was the better choice.

The best choice now.

x.X.x

Notes: And the song whose lyrics are "_Only blue. Lonely blue. Within me blue. Without you." _is from Without You, sung by Mimi and Roger in the musical Rent.


	4. Sun and Moon

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

x.X.x

**_You are sunlight and I'm moon_**

The melody played in her head— still in a dream state. Karura remembered a small laugh, or scoff, or chuckle or something of the sort coming from him. _Why am I the sun? _

_You just are— you're warm and you light up my day. Why wouldn't you be my sun?_

**_Joined by the gods of fortune_**

**_Midnight and high noon, that's what we are_**

Two celestial bodies— occupying the same sky yet never really sharing the same sky. Two different times of everyday. Two different worlds of dark and light. Yet daily they meet— when the light of the sun is not quite as harsh, and the moon peeks through the dawn. Then, they share a sky of light blue between them if only once or twice every single day.

_**How in one night have we come so far?**_

Karura opened her eyes slightly. They seemed not quite as heavy as they were yesterday. In fact, most of her body seemed better. She felt as if for the first time in how many days, she could finally lift herself up.

Karura pushed against the mattress beneath her and turned towards the window to her right. Her mind still dreaming of heavenly spheres, of planets and stars and moon— of her falling into Jupiter's orbit and being pulled closer towards him.

"_**Outside…day s-starts…to dawn**_" the words were hoarse on her lips as she watched the sky slowly turn blue. Her breath still shaky, head still spinning, legs still weak.

"_**One l-long…night time has g-gone**_" But she could _breathe, _and she could sit up and… For the first time since…she couldn't even remember… Karura could feel the warm of the desert sun rising in the horizon.

She could breathe, and she could sit up, and the room is slowly coming into focus. Was she getting better? A smile slowly found its way to her face Maybe, just maybe, she could stand to…and walk…towards the window…where the sunlight is…

Where the sunlight has been waiting for three years, eight months and nine days today.

_**"I f-feel you… near"**_

_**"I cry...no more"**_

Karura pushes herself away from the bed, accidentally knocking the spinning globe out of her bedside table. She took the longest strides just to reach the window— enough to steady her still weak legs.

_**"I know— you're here!"**_

_**"I reach your door!"**_

Her voice was no longer hoarse. Now, as melodious as it once was when she first sang that same tune. She was breathing perfectly now. Her legs were stronger as she tried to open the window— flinging it open and letting the sunlight back in.

_**"And our love is reborn"**_ A bright smile lit up her face as she gracefully extended her hand out of the window, her body light as air. Extended a hand towards the rising sun— to the sun god who's finally returned to her life.

Not a ghost or a phantom or a dark angel of death looming over her— but glorious sunlight and life and love.

He caught her outreached hand and drew her close to him, letting her wrap her arms around him, spinning her in his faster than the turning world. Karura didn't think she'd ever laugh like this again— clear as a silver bell. Or smile this brilliantly. Or feel this light and free…

Or once again feel what it was like to be wrapped around those familiar arms. To rest her head against his warmth. _To feel your love again._ She smiled and said, "I've missed you so," before leaning in and pressing soft lips against his.

In the dawn of that November morning, the small globe stopped spinning beside the body of a woman who never quite reached the window beside her bed. In the dawn of that November morning, the sun spread a gentle warmth over Sunagakure with the full moon visible in the sky.

x.X.x

Notes: The song is "Sun and Moon Reprise" sung by Kim (played by Lea Salonga) in Miss Saigon. It is of the utmost importance that it is Lea's version that you hear- and maybe, (just maybe because I might forget) I'll post a link in my profile of this particular song.


End file.
